Where flowers bloom

Where flowers bloom so does hope. ~Lady Bird Johnson

You'd think it's springtime around these parts. I keep envying the fall foliage I'm seeing posted everywhere, but then I realized after uploading these pics I had taken recently that we have color, too. Maybe not the way I prefer, but color nonetheless. As the song goes, you may not get what you want, but you get what you need.

Our satsumas are finally starting to ripen. Tiny green fruit resembling small limes began showing up in May. I counted almost 20 satsumas hanging from the branches. Finally, after months of waiting, they are ready to eat, and they are delicious!

I am deeply grateful for all the emails and prayers for my son and me. He has been MIA for 2 weeks, so I have filed a missing person's report with the LAPD. That's the very abbreviated version. I will give an update whenever I know more. Blogging, visiting other blogs, and commenting, along with praying, is keeping me sane for the time being.

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The Big Picture

When I became serious about photography four years ago, I was told very early on to "fill the frame". Once I saw the benefit of isolating a subject, I couldn't stop. In life I have no trouble "seeing the big picture", but in photography, give me the details, baby. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy all styles of photography from landscapes, to black and white, to artfully processed. And while I marvel at all the different styles, I still end up zeroing in on the details for my own stuff. I went out the other day with the intent to think more about composition and landscape, and by the end of the hour I was back to zooming in like nobody's business. In short, I'm in a rut, photographically speaking.

Last night I was at a dinner for my husband's potential clients. I was nervous before going, and prayed that God would help me be at ease, since social situations with strangers make me nervous. With my stomach tied in knots and a pounding headache, I trusted that God would get me through the evening. No surprise, my ailments slowly evaporated as I held several wonderful, meaningful conversations with all four couples; two of which are birders! They were telling me when and where to go and promised to call if they saw the bald eagle they had spotted recently in our neighborhood. My husband was showing off one of my bird shots on his phone and one of the ladies lit up and said, "You're a photographer? I need someone to shoot a graduation party." My heart sunk because I can't shoot people. I explained that I'm a nature photographer, but I do want to learn how to do portraits and people. Maybe one day.

After focusing on the big picture (pardon the pun), I came to the realization that my fears prevent me from being successful and happy. So I decided to find a local class that teaches portraiture. Right now I have an email out to a private tutor that specializes in portraits, since the community college classes were online only.

Below are examples of my attempt to get the "big picture", and how each time I ended up with a detail oriented shot. I'm determined to break this habit and branch out! The same way God is helping me to overcome my social phobias, I am confident that He will guide me in this and all areas. I just have to ask!

Anyone know what kind of flower this is?

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Afton Villa

More images from Afton Villa Gardens in St. Francisville, LA.

Many of you asked how the flowers are cared for at this abandoned site.
A caretaker was there watering all the plants. When asked about the property he
excitedly stopped watering to show us an old, faded photo of the original home.
He seemed to genuinely care for the place. Even though I understand Cajun accents fairly well,
this gentle soul had such a strong dialect that I had difficulty making out his words.
I did a lot of nodding and smiling, charmed by his animated ways and enthusiasm for the old place.
We still connected even though I didn't understand a thing he said! :) 

This pitiful calf mooed me over. I felt sorry for her because
she sounded sad. I petted her and scratched her head for a while
and she seemed to enjoy it. Maybe she was looking for her mama.

Cher bébé (Shah beh-bay), as we say around here. :)

I was captivated by this beautiful flower growing through the cracks of the old foundation.
How can you not admire something so strong and beautiful and determined?
Just goes to show that even though this flower doesn't have the perfect conditions in which to grow,
it grows anyway! And beautifully at that!

I'm not sure I will be keeping this layout. It works great for pictures, but the words stretching

all the way across on a smaller monitor do not automatically adjust, which is why I am centering

my text. But it looks kind of stupid with the text this way so I may have to go back
to the way it was before. If someone has a formatting suggestion, I'm all ears!

Participating in

Kate @ Thankful Thursday

Gulf Fritillary

My week without Double D hasn't gone exactly as planned. It rained for two days when it was supposed to be pleasant and sunshine-y AND I got burgundy highlights in my hair that went awry. We'll see what Double D's reaction is on his return. :/ Yesterday I managed to wiggle my way into a two-hour window of sunshine and got these bright orange fritillaries before another big deluge came. Although the weather has returned to higher temps than I'd like, I'm thankful that the rain has ended. Next week we're supposed to have more fall-like weather. Experimenting with Shadowhouse's shadow box frame.

Just thought I'd throw this grass photo in.

Sharing with Nancy @ Rural Thursday

AND

Kate @ Thankful Thursday

The Impossible

"Oh God, Oh God! that it were possible
To undo things done; to call back yesterday!
That time could turn up her swift and sandy glass,
To untell days, and to redeem these hours." ~ Thomas Heywood

Lately, I have felt my mom's absence in a huge way. When she passed away in February there was plenty to keep me distracted, what with packing, moving, etc. But now things have settled down, the daily calls from friends and relatives have slowed, and this allows more time for pesky thoughts to come barging in, intrusively demanding my attention. I keep pushing them away, but if I don't deal with them, I am awakened at 2 or 3 in the morning with their annoying persistence.

I guess specifically, I want a do-over for that whole period in the hospital with my mom. When the doctor said she wouldn't last more than a few hours off the breathing machine, then went on to live SEVEN MORE DAYS, I wish I had gone back to the doctors after DAY ONE and demanded, "Put her back on the machine. Now." But I didn't do that and it plagues me every single day. When you're exhausted and emotional and scared, it's not the best time to make a life-or-death decision. It really shows what you're made of, and I feel like I failed my mom, that I gave up too easily. Even though I had a team of doctors telling me that her quality of life would be severely diminished, that she would be in a nursing home unable to do for herself, I am still left to wonder... And she haunts some of my dreams.

Those are some of the things I have been dealing with lately. Sorry, didn't mean to get all Debbie Downer on you, so enough of that! All of us have our problems, right? Photography to the rescue! Last week I found another arboretum and got these photos. I have never seen coleus in such abundance. And finally, a clouded sulphur that sat still enough for me to get some shots!

"If tears could build a stairway, and memories a lane,

I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again."

 Linking up with Rural Thursday

Comments now closed. I deeply appreciate all of the wonderful advice and personal emails! I'm much better now!

St. Gabriel

I can't believe I'm posting three days in a row, but here I am! Today I went out to the cemetery to put autumn flowers on my mother's and sister's graves. It was a glorious day, with temps in the upper 70s, blue skies, and a slight breeze. Along the way I stopped and photographed some things I've wanted to shoot for some time.

This is the road where my grandparents' old house now resides. I love the funky lettering on the sign. Looks like they lost an O, two U's and a P and did the best they could. No pretense out here in the country!

This is my grandparents' home, relocated to its new position on Bayou Paul Rd. Although never in pristine shape it looked a lot better than this. It makes me sad to see it here, away from its original birthplace. There used to be a glass louvered door where that ugly white one is now. I got locked out once when I was home alone and broke one of the glass panes trying to get back in. Boy, did my paw paw fuss at me! The house also originally had a tin roof, but in later years they put on a more traditional roof. Looks like it's never been replaced.

This is how I like to remember the old house, with my grandmother beside it, and the levee out in front.
These are my two oldest kids with my grandmother, Celina, in 1985. Autumn looks upset and Greg looks like the cat that ate the canary. I can only guess what mischief that boy was up to. He looks mighty proud of himself.

St. Gabriel Catholic Church
This historic church is where my mother was christened, had her first communion, and was confirmed.
I think she married my dad here, but he doesn't really remember. :/
Built between 1774 and 1776, it is the oldest church in the Louisiana Purchase Territory.

This old store dating back to 1880 sits on the corner of Bayou Paul Rd. and Hwy. 75 (River Rd.)

The levee, across the street from Barthel's store.

Hope you enjoyed meandering along the River Rd. with me today. Sharing with Nancy's Rural Thursday.